IN MAY 2005, I was a healthy 48-year-old working in the financial district. One day, I discovered thick mucus stuck in my nose. After a series of medical tests, I did my quiet time in my office before I went to collect my test results. I prayed for healing, and God said: “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.”
I got a shock. I recognised it immediately; it was from 2 Corinthians 12:9a and written by the Apostle Paul who had asked God to remove the thorn in his flesh. God did not remove it but assured him of His grace, i.e. the forgiveness of sin through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Furthermore, God promised to demonstrate His power in Paul’s weakness. e implication I gleaned was that I had to go through a painful sickness but had the assurance of grace. God would use my weakness to demonstrate His power.
My doctor told me that I had cancer of the left sinus located between my eyebrows. It was a very rare form of cancer unlike the more common form of nose cancer. He prayed for me. It was a miracle that through another doctor and church friend, I was able to get an appointment with a well-known surgeon at an established cancer hospital. e surgery was done within weeks amid much prayer among my family, friends and church members.
However, the cancer proved more aggressive than anyone expected, returning within eight weeks. I had to go through intensive radiotherapy which permanently damaged part of the vision in my left eye. e radiotherapy sessions lasted six months and it was hard going. e surgery had resulted in the removal of my olfactory organ, meaning that I could no longer smell anything. I went through a loss of appetite, physical weakness, depression and even spiritual attack with serious thoughts of suicide. Only by turning to Jesus Christ was I able to ward off the spiritual attack.
Two weeks after the end of the radiotherapy, I had a major seizure that landed me in hospital for one week. It is a condition that I still suffer from and I have to take my medication daily. Twelve weeks after the end of the radiotherapy, test results showed that the cancer had come back yet again. e doctors were uniformly gloomy.
e next course of medical treatment could only be chemotherapy, but my type of cancer cannot be effectively treated by chemotherapy drugs. I turned to a medical specialist who used a new type of drug that had only been introduced in the United States the year before. His objective was only to prolong my life by between six months and one year.
Before I started my chemotherapy, I asked the pastor-in-charge of my church to recommend an organisation that would arrange for my wife and I to do a Holy Land tour of Israel. It was quite unexpected that he rounded up 20 of us and accompanied us there for an interesting and fulfilling time in March 2006.
After we returned from Israel, I had 18 relaxed chemotherapy sessions ending in September 2006 with only one side effect of partial hearing loss. The chemotherapy ended just in time to celebrate my 50th birthday amid much joy and thanksgiving among my prayer partners and friends. e remnants of the tumour have been receding or stable since the end of the chemotherapy treatment. is was an unexpected result and my doctors consider it a miracle of God.
In 2007, I wondered why this rare type of cancer had struck me. I had rarely smoked. It did not make sense to me. Was it because God was punishing me? Or was it because we had a God who could not protect me from this fallen world?
After hours of prayer, I believe that this was all designed by God. God is sovereign. If it is in His will to bring me home, I will be brought home. If it is in His will that I remain, I will remain in this world for more months or years to come. Whether I go or remain a little while longer, I will always pray that I bring glory to God.
I recognised that after surviving my cancer, I could no longer work full time. I decided to put aside my partial vision loss, partial hearing loss, total loss of smell and occasional seizures to serve God in whatever way I could. One challenging area has been to conduct Bible studies in prison.
I celebrated my 55th birthday last month, thanking God as the giver of Life!
Alan Lim is a member of Barker Road Methodist Church.