At The Well

Like the Samaritan woman from John 4, we too may experience troubles in our relationships or encounter people who lead us away from how we hope to live.

Life-giving encouragement centred on God’s word brings hope and reconciliation. MM’s panel of counsellors will answer your relationship questions. Would you come and chat with us?



(most recent article of all four categories)


The guilt from having aborted my child stays with me

A few years ago, I discovered that I was pregnant with my second child. In the fourth month of pregnancy, the scans revealed that there were developmental issues with my baby. An amniocentesis confirmed the likelihood of genetic conditions that would lead to physical and learning disabilities. My husband and I were devastated and did not know what to do. We sought counselling and even went for healing prayers. Our family members advised us to terminate the pregnancy as the long-term care needs of the child would be tremendous. On the other hand, my Christian friends encouraged us to keep the baby and to trust God for the future. In the end, I chose to terminate the pregnancy as I was already caring for my first child and did not have the capacity or resources to care for a disabled child. I know the Bible is against abortion. Even though what happened is in the past, I still struggle with a sense of guilt. Would God have wanted me to keep my child? Or would he understand that I did not have the ability to care for a disabled child? How do I come to terms with the decision I made?


I seem to have lost a friend

I have always looked up to a sister from a former church. She is an intercessor like me and I learned from her spiritual insights. I am an introvert; she has been my only best friend for the past 40 years. We meet once a year over Christmas. When her husband passed away 10 years ago, my friend slowly changed her behaviour. She became forceful and assertive over time. Last year she abruptly broke off the friendship and we didn’t meet at Christmas. I have been praying for God to restore our friendship but my prayer is still unanswered. I am hurting over the loss of a cherished friendship. My faith in God is badly shaken. Emotionally and spiritually, I feel rejected, lonely and vulnerable. It’s hard to make new friends.

At the Workplace

Should I blow the whistle on a colleague who trusts me?

My colleague was unhappy that I reported an error which occurred to my bosses. As per protocol, this involved listing the names of all of the personnel involved in the incident. He later confessed to me over text that he had not been reporting such incidents to my bosses due to fear of negative repercussions. I feel that this is not the right thing to do. Should I blow the whistle on this colleague to my supervisor?

Our Panellists

Benny Bong

Benny Bong has been a family and marital therapist for nearly 40 years. Besides providing counselling, he also coaches social workers, counsellors, and has worked with numerous organisations in his capacity as a trainer and consultant. Benny is the author of Couples in Crisis: How to Avoid Common Pitfalls in Your Marriage, which was published in 2008. Benny has helmed the You & Your Family column in Methodist Message for more than 16 years. He is a member of Kampong Kapor Methodist Church.

Rev Tay Li Ping

Rev Tay Li Ping is currently pastoring at Christalite Methodist Chapel. She is married to Joseph, her college sweetheart, and they have five sons—three biological, one adopted and one foster. Before becoming a pastor, Rev Tay was an Industrial-Organisational Psychologist with the Ministry of Defence, and was a stay-at-home mum for a period of time. Rev Tay is particularly interested in the intersection of Psychology and Spirituality / Theology.

Koh Ai Jin

Koh Ai Jin is a registered clinical counsellor and clinical supervisor with the Singapore Association for Counselling. She has extensive experience in marriage and family counselling, and addressing mental health concerns and psychological trauma. Passionate about both counselling and Christian ministry, Ai Jin has worked in church settings for over a decade, was previously a polytechnic lecturer and now serves as Vice-President of the Association of Christian Counsellors (Singapore). She is married to a Methodist pastor and they have three teenage children.