Dating & Marriage

My wife is discouraged by our lack of success with IVF

My wife and I have been trying to have a child for several years. We have tried IVF but so far have not been successful. The whole process has not only been costly, but also emotionally draining and stressful for our relationship.

Dating a non-Christian

I’ve dated a few Christians in the past, but things did not work out due to various reasons such as not being financially stable and having cultural differences. Recently, I started dating a Thai lady. She is not of the same faith. I understand that as a Christian, we should not be unequally yoked. If both parties are serious and committed to work things out, should I continue dating her? I know there will be many obstacles ahead, such as my parents, who I think will object to a daughter-in-law of a different faith and nationality.

Should I stay and care for my ex-husband, who has been diagnosed with Parkinson’s?

After a 22-year long marriage, I finally filed for divorce. I struggled with this decision for almost a decade. He was emotionally distant and generally a traditional, chauvinistic family man. We function like housemates who happen to share two children. A few months after the uncontested divorce was finalised by the courts, he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. He is only 49 years old. I am at a loss for what to do—if I leave him, the caregiving burden will likely fall on the children, who will resent their mother for divorcing their father. If I stay, I will be resentful every day. What can I do now? The children are still unaware of the divorce and their father’s illness.

My wife has a hoarding habit

My wife has a habit of shopping and accumulating things. Our home has become so cluttered that when guests come, they have nowhere to sit because there are things everywhere and I must physically shift items to make space. I am too embarrassed to invite family or friends over. I have spoken to her many times to change her habit of online shopping and buying things even though the items she buys are educational such as books or good toys for my young children. We are financially very comfortable so there is nothing to curb her shopping habit. We have given some items away but she then acquires other things and we are back to square one. Is a hoarding habit something serious or is it just a personality thing? I do not want to pick a fight with her because she is overall a good mother and wife and God-fearing.

Should I date my long-time friend who is twice divorced?

I’ve known Mr X for nearly 20 years and have seen him through two failed marriages. He is now a single parent with a young daughter, who I’m very close to. In our younger days, Mr X had expressed an interest in me but I made it clear that I was not keen in a romantic relationship with him; he respected my decision and so we remained platonic friends. Recently, his daughter asked if I can be her mummy, causing me to question my feelings for Mr X. We’ve matured together and have a comfortable relationship and I could see myself with him now, seeing this is a different kind of love and season. Should I talk to Mr X or keep my distance?

My husband does not want to explore IVF

My husband and I have been trying to conceive but have not been successful. We have discussed assistive treatments and did two rounds of IUI to no avail. IVF seems to be the natural next step, which is aligned with my beliefs, desires and hopes, but my husband is not comfortable with the idea. As a woman, I feel that that denies me the opportunity to be a mother and the biological clock is ticking; as a wife, I’m called to submit. What should I do?

Hubby doesn’t value date nights

The husband doesn’t value date nights and never puts in effort in planning. He remembers his appointments with his colleagues and friends but nothing about us. Whenever I bring this up, he flares up. I’m tired of the marriage. Should we divorce?

Is using a private investigator the right thing to do?

My brother suspects that his wife is being unfaithful. He is thinking of engaging a private investigator to obtain proof of her infidelity. As a Christian, is this something that he should be doing? Wouldn’t it open the possibility of divorce, which is considered wrong?

Remarrying after divorce

My brother has been a divorcé for 7 years after his ex-wife was found to be unfaithful to him. He met someone a year ago in church and they are planning to marry next year. I’m not a believer (my brother and his wife-to-be are) but I am curious: Is it wrong for him to remarry? Does the Bible consider it adultery?

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