At The Well

Teenage son talks back to his teachers

My nearly-adult teenage son does well in school both academically and in CCAs. However, he gets into trouble every year for talking back to his teachers. Some teachers absolutely adore him; they are the ones who see his heart. But teachers that are “not nice” will bear the brunt of his talkback because he has no respect for either their poor teaching skills or their difficult personalities. He is often the one at fault, but I don’t know how to get him to rein in his tongue. ~ Fed-up Mama

Caught between two friends

I am friends with a couple and have known the husband and wife for nearly a decade now. On the outside, they look like the perfect couple—stable jobs, great kids, nice house, God-fearing family. However, both the husband and wife confide in me separately and share their deepest, darkest secrets with me. They do not know that I am hearing both sides of their stories. I have told them to talk to each other in my separate chats, or to consider couples counselling. How should I tell them I do not want to be involved and that it’s too much for me? ~ Friend in the middle

My husband is “fighting his feelings” towards another woman—is this infidelity?

My husband of 25 years told me he fell in love with someone my daughter’s age. He says he has never felt this way before. I consider this infidelity. He does not because he says he is fighting his feelings. I am so hurt. Is he right? Am I too sensitive? How can I be with a man who doesn’t love me but loves someone else? ~ Broken

Is it okay for my husband to give his female colleague a ride to work frequently?

My husband and I have been married for seven years and we have two children. Recently, I found out that he has been giving a female colleague a ride to work frequently. I found this out by accident when I saw a message coming into his phone which was left on the table, confirming pick-up time. When I asked my husband about it, he said this colleague lives along the way to the office and her husband was unable to send her to work on some days. He claimed that he picked her up only occasionally and he was just being helpful. I do not feel comfortable with this arrangement and told him so. Instead of respecting my wishes, he accused me of being controlling and insecure. I also found out that after a business trip they would share a taxi back together as our homes are close. While this sounds convenient, I am not comfortable with the thought. What should I do? Am I being difficult? ~ Concerned

My friends laugh at me and avoid me

I am an 11-year-old. I have a small group of friends but recently they have been hanging out with my ex-friend. Sometimes they laugh at me and avoid me. Should I confront them or just stay quiet? ~ Lonely

My daughter has gender dysphoria and wants a sex change surgery

My 17-year-old child has gender dysphoria. As my husband and I are Christians, we have tried our best to share with her about what the Bible says about sexuality and at the same time show her love and acceptance. She has pleaded with us to allow her to go for a sex change surgery and because we refused, she has become distraught and engages in self-harm. Our relationship with her has become very strained. We brought her to see a counsellor but the sessions end up as heated arguments because she will not accept our views and feels that we are imposing our Christian beliefs on her. As parents, we are at our wits’ end. It pains us to see her struggle mentally and emotionally. We also struggle with guilt and wonder how things have turned out this way. ~ Help

Do I bring my daughter to visit a friend whose adult child has a live-in partner of the same sex in their home?

A friend has a daughter who is lesbian and has a live-in partner … in my friend’s home. My friend is Christian but her daughter is not. My question is not about my friend’s or her daughter’s choices, but mine, as a parent. Should we bring along my primary-school aged daughter to visit her during Christmas and Chinese New Year, as we used to do? Part of me does not want to expose my daughter to a non-Christian model of family, but yet, to shield her from it seems futile. ~ Awkward

My recently widowed father is dating a woman who is younger than me

I am in my 40s and married with teenage children. My mother passed away from illness about six months ago. Recently, I found out that my 75-year-old father is dating a foreign lady who is younger than me. He introduced her to us at a family dinner and privately told us that that he plans to let her move into our family home. He then asked me to clear out my old room so she could move her things in. I was very angry and upset. I also do not feel comfortable with this lady, and I feel suspicious of her. I expressed caution to my father, but he is totally caught up with her. I understand my father is grieving, lonely and seeks companionship, but I want to protect him from being taken advantage of. ~ Suspicious

Is an Advance Medical Directive appropriate for Christians?

Is an Advance Medical Directive (AMD) allowed in a biblical world view, if we acknowledge that God is in control of our lives? I am going for a surgery and want to be prepared so that my family does not have to face difficult decisions or financial burdens as I am already in my senior years. ~ Singaporean senior

If a spouse agrees to divorce, would it mean he doesn’t believe that God can heal the marriage?

From what I understand, divorce is permissible if one party commits adultery and wants to divorce their legal spouse. If the spouse agrees to the divorce, would it mean he/she does not believe that God can heal the marriage? On the other hand, if the spouse does not agree to the divorce, is he/she being stubborn and overly optimistic? In what circumstances would God not want the spouse to divorce the party who continues to commit adultery? ~ Wondering

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