You & Your Family

Modelling the family, both earthly and spiritual

Shame is a strong emotion that often shows up in my counselling sessions. Its presence can be debilitating; its absence can also be problematic. To explore healing from shame, I will share examples where shame was largely absent, was partially felt and where it can be overwhelming.

Healing from shame: Guilt, forgiveness and moving forward

Shame is a strong emotion that often shows up in my counselling sessions. Its presence can be debilitating; its absence can also be problematic. To explore healing from shame, I will share examples where shame was largely absent, was partially felt and where it can be overwhelming.

Flipping the narrative on YOLO: Duty, joy and eternal perspective

The 1967 James Bond movie starring Sean Connery had the improbable title, \”You Only Live Twice\”. The contrast with the present-day concept of YOLO, or \”You Only Live Once\” suggests a generational change in how many individuals approach life and family today.

Honouring parents willingly

The Maintenance of Parents Bill, a law passed in 1995, allows elderly parents unable to support themselves to apply to the Courts to make their adult children provide financially for them. Some may wonder if this is an instance of a secular law being put in place to compel children to fulfil God’s commandment to “Honour your father and your mother” (Exodus 20:12). I think not.

When siblings fight

As a family therapist, I have worked for many years on conflicts among family members. Conflict involving spouses, the young or the elderly often draw society’s sympathy and support but disputes between siblings generally do not get enough attention.

Moving on from grief

Profound loss can lead to a loss of direction and motivation in life. Daily routines lose meaning, former pleasures no longer bring joy, and we may withdraw from people, interests and life. In extreme cases, the sense of emptiness can lead to depression and even thoughts of taking one’s own life. How do hurting and grieving souls move on with life?

A step back from the brink

Metaphors can be a powerful communication tool in counselling. One I recently shared with a couple “stuck” in their marital distress is an image of a couple standing together at the edge of a cliff. They are at this precarious place where one step forward or a slip of their feet may mean plunging over the brink.

Hope is the catalyst for change

“I think I finally get it.” My client’s statement reflected a radical change although his circumstances had not changed much. His wife of nearly 15 years had left him about three years earlier and had not once made any direct contact since.

Menu